Summary: Gwen Cooper doesn’t want to marry Captain Jack Harkness so she sends her cousin Ianto in her place. The only problem Ianto didn’t agree to help, and Jack is expecting a woman. What happens when things do go as planned? An AU that has a bit from everywhere most of it is my own creation but any characters you recognize belong to RTD, and BBC. I am making no profit from this.
Warnings: Swearing, schmoop, man love, big AU, cross dressing,
“Ianto! Ianto, where are you,” Gwen continued calling throughout the manor house looking for her lost cousin. She had to find him and find him damn soon or she was going to have to come up with another plan. There was no way her Uncle Huw was going to force her into marrying some old Cardiff Lord. If he wanted some kind of alliance then one of his children can marry up with Lord Harkness.
She had been doing a little digging of her own. Lord Jackson Harkness, a loyal captain in the royal guards. He was the adopted son of Doctor John and Sarah Jane Smith; both member’s in good standing of the court. He had spent the last three years on the continent battling against the Cybrus in King William’s name. Captain Jack had saved Prince Owen and taken out a whole enemy garrison during the last battles for Hanover. He had been given a large estate and made ruling Lord of the City of Cardiff
Gwen Elizabeth Cooper had big plans for herself and becoming a dowdy lady to an aging military has been who spent all his time reliving his past glories wasn’t one of them.
She had a good man who loved her and who she adored. She was going to marry him come hell or high water and the first part of her plan was finding young cousin Ianto.
“I’m right here, Gwen,” Ianto said leaning against the library door. She should have known he was reading something. Uncle Huw was always after Ianto to get his head out of books and get his work done. Maybe her plan would help Ianto find out that there was more to life than what he saw in those books of his.
“Oh finally, I need your help I have a couple of things left to pack.”
“Gwen, you should have had everything downstairs already,” Ianto said his hands on his hips. “My travel case is already in the cab. I thought you had everything down there last night.”
“I do but I decided to bring along a few more. Come help me please, before Uncle Huw comes looking for me. I want to get this all over with. In fact, I think I’d just as soon leave without saying goodbye to anyone.”
Ianto reached out for her hand. “Gwen, I know you’re still angry about this whole arrangement but Captain Harkness is a good man and he will provide you a good home. We don’t mind caring for you, Gwen but we all have to do our part. You have to marry Harkness and I am expected to do my part too. Father will be meeting with Merchant Hallet next week to see if he would like to ally our houses.”
“Why can’t we marry for love like Rhi did?”
“Gwen, hush, if Father heard you saying her name we would be sent on the toe of his boot to Cardiff. Rhi might have married for love but it won’t always get food on the table for you, will it? Now let’s get your bags gathered and get going. I think you might have the right idea let’s get a move on.”
Gwen pulled Ianto up the stairs to her room. “I’m sorry that Aunt Mairwen is too ill to travel but I’m thrilled you will be my chaperon for the trip, Ianto,” Gwen said loudly as she opened her door.
“The whole house know-”
Gwen turned around and saw Ianto fall to his knees.
“I hope you didn’t hit him to hard Rhys,” Gwen said rushing over to check her cousin’s health out. “Oh good, he’s still breathing. Let’s get him out of his suit and into that damn dress. I can’t believe anyone would think I would look good in yellow.”
“Are you sure about this Gwen?” Rhys asked pulling off Ianto’s pants and shirt. He left on Ianto’s boxers and undershirt.
“Shush, Rhys, do you want to bring everyone in the house here?” Gwen asked, putting the finishing touches on her cousin’s make up before sliding the yellow linen dress over her cousin’s dark head.
“I don’t know about this.”
“Do you want me to marry this Prince Captain Jack?”
“No, of course not, but sending Ianto in your place. And not even asking him to help but just whacking him on the back of the head and dressing him in your clothes. What’s Harkness going to think when he gets there?”
“He’s going to be a little pissed off but then he’ll send Ianto home, and by then you and I will be long gone from Swansea and married. My family will forgive me and welcome me home with loving arms. They’ll accept you and we’ll have a lot of babies. I doubt this Prince Jack wants to marry me any more than I want to marry him. This way I’m giving him a way out too.
“When you say it like that you almost make it seem reasonable,” Rhys said, shoving Ianto’s feet into Gwen’s slippers.
Gwen gave Rhys’ cheek a quick kiss. “Don’t be a big worrywart. Now, we need to get Ianto hidden away in the cab before anyone comes looking for me. Once we get a few miles out of town I’ll say I need to get a bit of air and -“
“Banana and I will be waiting with horses for us. We’ll knock out the driver and Banana will take over and deliver Ianto to Cardiff and to Harkness’ hands.”
Gwen leaned over and gave his true love a kiss on his ample cheek. “It will work perfectly, it has to.”
Rhys pulled out the large travel case. They should be able to get Ianto tucked in it without having to fold him too badly.
“Once you get this case down into the waiting cab open it and arrange Ianto to look like he’s sitting up. You can go tell Dennis that we’re ready to leave and I’ll get on Ianto’s suit and stick my hair up under his hat. After we’ve gone you can tell Uncle Huw that I didn’t want a big scene and that we left early. I’m sure he’ll get word to Cardiff.”
Rhys tried to put Ianto in as gently as he could but he knew Ianto was going to have more than a few bruises when he got to Cardiff tonight.
“That’s the only part that worries me,” Rhys said, finishing buckling up the case.
“Arriving early?” Gwen asked.
“No, telling Huw,” Rhys said, lifting the luggage up over his shoulder. “Ianto needs to eat more, he barely weighs anything.”
“He can’t stand sitting at the table with Uncle Huw. Maybe getting away from Huw is the best thing for us all.”